Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Maybe I'm just a bad friend?

Yet, sadly, I don't feel badly. So maybe I'm just an ass? Or maybe it's just that as I get older I feel less and less willing to deal with stupid shit from people. As previous blogs would state, I'm all for open mindedness & respecting the right for people to believe what they want. Regardless of topic.. it doesn't matter if it's religion, politics, life, abortion, marriage, jobs, whatever. If you're open minded to what others have to say I'm open minded towards you.

Here's where my problems lay... As an adult we get to make many choices many times a day. Some are impulsive, some are well thought out, some are done out of necessity. Like right now, I'm thirsty, so I'm going to make the choice to go get a cup of coffee. See, that was somewhat thought out. Now, if I were thirsty and decided to go buy a coffee maker, that'd be a little more impulsive. As such, people make impulsive decisions all the time, it's human nature and I'm no exception to that rule. However, some must require you to think out the consequences. Not to bash on any one friend, I'll use a generic example. You impulsively decide you MUST have a pet. Doesn't matter what kind of pet this is, but you MUST have it! Who am I to say you shouldn't or that it's a bad idea? It's your life right? One would assume that if you MUST have it that you put some thought behind it.. Especially if your job is one that sends you out of town for weeks to months on end. Right? That'd be something you'd want to think out ahead of time, kind of goes with responsibility right? Or maybe I'm stretching the thought process too far..

Either way, I don't feel as though I need my house invaded with whatever pet it is because you couldn't say no and walk away. Granted there are exceptions to every rule. For example, the job is new and you had the pet first. But to willingly get a pet knowing you're going to be on the road kind of says you only went on impulse, not looking at what problems it will present. I mean, sure it may be a little selfish, but I'm not sure why I should have to sacrifice my time/$$ for a decision I didn't make.

I'm kind of sad over it too, only because I'm starting to really see things clearer after my disaster day. Maybe because I'm really seeing what and who is important to me in my life. Maybe I just over read the situation, or maybe I'm just tired. I'll use examples, without names nor locations to show my point.. 'Friend A' has been noted before in this blog. Nothing's changed, still inside their own little bubble. 'Friend B' is someone who I thought was a good friend. But what I'm seeing is that she has all kinds of guy friends. I'd say about 99% of them are guys who hope that by being her friend she'll date them. As such, they will do whatever she asks of them, pretty much no questions asked. Because of that, I can see how she uses that to her advantage and probably doesn't even realize it. I just won't bend to those levels because I have no motive other than just being a friend. On the opposite side of the spectrum is 'Friend C'. Friend C is someone who I've known for about 4 years now, spent some time with, worked with, etc. Obviously last week was a bad week, but this friend stepped up to a level I wouldn't have expected. I mean, I know we're close friends, I just didn't think that close when it was offered to me to use their other car until my Jeep was back. I was shocked, I mean out of all my friends, I never would have thought he'd do that. It made me feel special and grateful for those friends I do have. Sharing the spotlight with Friend C is Friend E. Yes, I know I skipped D. But Friend E is someone who I credit with being an awesome friend.

Call it whatever you want, but the friendships and things I have with people are definitely being altered as I quit sitting back and just letting people get away with whatever. There is a definite change in the air.

Here's a little funny to take the edge off a long winded irritated post!


~E said...

1) You let me vent to you about my guy problems

2) You actually mean it when you ask me how I'm doing.

3) You come rescue me from boring wedding receptions

You know what that means?!?! You are not a bad friend. In fact I would go so far as to say you are "great"!


..:: C ::.. said...

Thanks ;) I just feel maybe it's my bad that I feel that way about other 'friends', like maybe it's petty or something. And maybe it is, but I can only deal with it for so long...